First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize