My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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