I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize
