Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
