Just cropdusted the office
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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