Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
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