I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize