Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Randomize
