No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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