but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
