Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Randomize
