I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
