It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
