dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
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