Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize