We're facebook friends in real life
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
