Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Randomize
