I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Randomize
