I cockslap morals
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize
