I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize