People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Randomize
