just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
