I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
How does it feel to date your dad?
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Randomize
