I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
