Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Randomize
