Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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