Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
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