I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Randomize
