we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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