I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Swine flu is the new snow day.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
