So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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