girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
