dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
