So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
