.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
