Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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