we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Randomize
