Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize