If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize