We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
me + whiskey = a bad person
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
