There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
