Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Randomize
