good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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