dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I wish i was in the wii world.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
