This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
