You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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