garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
