haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Randomize
