I just made out with a guy for $7.
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
