So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Randomize
